To Show or Not to Show Because the Show Must ...

As many of you or most likely all of you know, I work in film and television. While I really enjoy the writing process and communicating with folks through these articles, the mortgage must be paid and so the movie/mini-series/television show must be shot. The conventions must be attended. The photo shoots must be posed for. It's a living, a good one, and I am grateful.

Those of us who participate in the creation of these forms of entertainment have for years and years shown up to work no matter what. I mean no matter how ill, distraught, disfigured we may be, we go to work. To call in sick has heretofore been unthinkable. Just simply not done. To do so would be to risk becoming uninsurable and therefore unable to work. So death in the family, pneumonia, broken leg, stomach flu, these have all come along to work with us. We have swapped germs like kindergartners for as long as anyone can remember.

This means on a series there is generally a group of folks who are sick at all times. Round and round the bugs would go, all of us taking turns hacking and puking and icing.

I can remember on Sabrina a young, flu-plagued Melissa Joan Hart throwing up into a trashcan just next to set, then bouncing back into the scene. “ Action!” It's the job.

The introduction of COVID 19 has, of course, interrupted this decades-long tradition. Actors and crew are tested and tested and tested. If you are positive, you go home and you stay there for ten days. Schedules are rearranged for cast members. Substitutes are found for crew. Every effort is made to protect the production from mass infection and for the most part, this is effective. Shutdowns happen, but the mantle is picked up again and project after project has been completed. It's expensive and annoying and never perfect. As an actor, it is profoundly odd to have one's hair and makeup done and then put a mask on. I frequently forget, only to be chased by a determined young PA waving a KN95 at me.

"Ma'am, you HAVE to wear this!” “Oh, right! Sorry, sorry; I'm sorry."

So we do our best but mistakes are made. Every show I have been on has sent the inevitable email informing me that some person or persons on the set turned up positive on the days I was there. We take it all in stride now. It is what it is.

We are as careful as we can be at work regarding the dreaded COVID. Here is the question though: What about the other bugs? What about the common cold, the elevated fever, the sinus infection, or a bout of food poisoning? What if test after test for the dreaded COVID is negative but one has managed to contract some other transmissible disease? What then?

I recently finished up work on a TV mini-series and sped to the airport to attend a Convention of Stars from classic 90's TV shows. It was a great opportunity to spend time with my former Sabrina the Teenage Witch castmates. I love those folks. They are family. Used to be that attending a convention to meet one's fans was frowned upon, but it is common now, an important way to connect.

I arrived Thursday night in time to catch up with Jenna Leigh Green, the wonderful, talented gal who played “Libby" on the show. We had a delicious dinner and turned in early. I woke up the next morning with what felt like allergies. My voice was a bit scratchy, but otherwise, I felt fine. As a precaution, I went to CVS and bought allergy meds and of course, the requisite COVID tests, because one sneeze ...

Negative.

Another test.

Negative.

Phew! The day wore on and eventually, Jenna, Caroline Rhea (Hilda), Nate Ritchert (Harvey), and I headed to the convention hall to meet and greet. My voice was starting to really fade. I definitely had laryngitis and was starting to feel stuffy and sneezy; Caroline cocked her head at me, questioning.

"It's not COVID, I promise? I just came off a show ... tested a zillion times and again this morning." I said.

"Don't get me sick, Missy. I have a job when I get back."

Oh no! I worried. What if I get her sick? She has a job when she gets back Dang it!

I should have gone straight back to the hotel that night, but I had dinner plans with an old friend who lives in the area, and I hate to cancel on people. I am a show-er-upper. On time too. I am religiously punctual, a classic nerd. So, we shared a lovely meal, though I struggled to raise my voice above a hoarse whisper. He did not care a whit that I was not feeling 100%. We were glad to see each other. Honestly, I think we are all just ready to get on with our lives.

The next morning my throat was on fire, really sore. It had begun waking me halfway through the night and now was downright brutal.

Another Covid test.

Negative.

The hair and make-up team arrived at 7:15 AM. I greeted them with masks and insisted they wear them while working on me. They were completely non-plussed by my obvious illness.

These are folks who are accustomed to getting on with it.

Press starts at 8:30, followed by a panel. Even with a microphone, I could barely be heard. Melissa spoke up for me when she could. She reads my articles and keeps up with my life. She knows me so well that she can just jump in, she did, and it worked.

I run into Candace Cameron Bure in the backstage area. She is even more beautiful in person and every bit as gracious and lovely a human as you are thinking she might be.

"I have laryngitis. It's not COVID, I promise!"

She shrugged and gave me a warm Candace hug.

"I don't care. " She smiled. "I have had it and I am not worried. I have superpowers.” A wink.

She is so dear. I wished we could sit and catch up, but we were both on tight schedules.

I was really, truly not feeling well when we start the group photo session. Folks have spent some serious cash to be in a picture with the five of us. I cannot abandon ship. It's the job.

At one point I started to feel dizzy and put my head between my knees. Someone grabbed a chair and then, so I would not look ridiculous, Caroline grabbed a second one and sat beside me. One by one the fans come in. Smile click. Smile click. I grew pale and Caroline worried.

“Are you going to throw up?" she asked, seeing my distress. “Um, I think so"

I raced outside and someone grabbed a waste can, and I did indeed throw up. Someone else handed me a towel, this all happened with speed and efficiency. We have all been to this rodeo before. I headed back in. Melissa had switched with Caroline and now sat next to me. Smile click. Smile click.

This all sounds very dramatic of course, but in truth, I had not eaten anything except clearly too many vitamin C gummies. Having given up gluten and dairy I was faced with a buffet of bagels abstained in the interest of my well-being. It could credibly be argued that this choice on that day was not the healthy one.

We got through it, and I took a break before heading to my booth to pose with folks there. I also took another test.

Negative.

I was suffering from a bad cold and an acute case of being a dipshit.

Not one person was upset that I had laryngitis. Not one fan hesitated to pose with me, and each wanted to hug me. One man handed me his baby. Another took a photo with me and then whispered, “I am bringing my girlfriend back in here ... going to propose." And in she came and down on one knee he went. It was the sweetest thing, the way she said yes through tears. I was touched to be their witness. Melissa dashed over and we posed with them after big happy hugs. Love.

Lorraine and her friend Karen came by multiple times. One an OR nurse and the other a graphic designer. They show up at one point dressed as Hilda and Zelda. They are whip-smart these gals and they have serious lives. This is the way they let their hair down (or put their wig on as it were) Adorable. We love them. Lorraine the nurse recommends a strongly brewed cup of "Throat Coat” tea.

The next day was equally long and grueling, but I pushed through it, and the folks at "That's 4 Entertainment" went the extra mile to make sure I had all of the support they could give me.

They were the essence of generosity and grace. One of the last fans to approach me was a man in his early thirties. He handed me a note and I put it aside to read later.

Back at the hotel I found his note in my purse and read the card inside. It said in part that Sabrina the Teenage Witch was one of the only comforts he had during an abusive childhood. Then: "Zelda is the reason I love art and history and science. Finally getting to meet you all is proof that there is magic in ordinary life."

The honor is mine, young man. You are the reason we show up for the show. Magic indeed.

One last test before I head to the airport.

Negative.

To show or not show, to go or not go, is a tough dilemma and will become more so as we chart our way through post-pandemic waters. How many negative tests are enough negative tests? If I thought for one moment that I had COVID I would not have gone, but a head cold? Do we let down hundreds of people for that?

As we said goodbye, Nate had a sore throat but swore it could have been from anyone or anywhere. Jenna was resolute about her perfectly fine-ness. Caroline said:

"If I get whatever you have, I am going to break every bone in your tiny little body!" then wrapped me in her arms.

Melissa is going to worry and worry until she is certain I am well, but she would not have it any other way.

Flight note:

The first leg of the flight home I was coping with a crazy runny nose and shallow cough. The lady next to me kept saying with deep consternation, “Is there something you need?"

The second leg the man next to me endured my sneezing, trying-desperately-not-to-hack presence for an hour before turning to say

"Last month I flew with a barn-burner of a head cold. Took so much medicine so I wouldn't sneeze that my heart pounded the whole time. It's tough,"

"Yeah, it is ...Thanks," I said.

On we go ...