Because my mom worked in academia, I probably knew more openly gay men growing up than most folks of my generation. One of her coleagues used to stay at our house to keep my brother and I out of trouble when my parents were out of town. I did not know that he was gay until later, when we all went to the drive-in together and he was holding hands with another man. My mom preferred that we figure out for ourselves that he was gay so that we would understand how perfectly normal, even unremarkable in some ways, that it was,
He eventually left town. I did not know why until we got a letter from him. He had been diagnosed with AIDS. His family here in Tucson barely tolerated but never really accepted his gay-ness, so he went Back East to spend the last days of his life among some dear friends there. I never heard that he passed until a year or two later when his name came up in an article about the AIDS quilt in The New Republic.
***
I know some folks who work in AIDS non-profits here in town. One of them provides for hair-and-makeup services for HIV+ folks to feel presentable for job interviews or to otherwise be out in public. One thing I have come away with from talking to them is how the day-to-day work of these charities seems so mundane. In the public discussion, there is a tendency to look at the big picture in terms of fund-raising and public policy and to overlook the everyday problems that folks need help with. That is why we need to hear stories like this, to remind us that it is ultimately about human beings trying to figure out how to make it through the day.
I think what humanity could use right now, especially now, is your life story in book form. Within such pages would be found definitive examples of caring and giving back. And much more - dedication, professionalism, humor, how to choose your own path, putting others first and of course love. Everything in your wonderful articles but in chronological order. A gift!
It’s easy for me to say. I’m not nearly as busy as you are.
But you wouldn’t have to teach Fairness to read. He’s experiencing it first-hand.
I feel like I may be ready for a book. It seems like time. Some of these stories are demanding to be told and I think that is a direct response to the chaos all around us now. Thank you for your support!
All the people. The ones you helped thrive. The ones who crossed your path but somehow couldn’t be reached. The ones, like Walta, now with the angels. Their stories have your voice.
Then, there’s your life’s journey. Before that actress who became so willing to mentor newcomers. Before the ladies and children of the Good Shepherd Shelter were uplifted by your group’s boundless efforts. Before the heartbreaking HIV/AIDS devastation. Before all that there was a young person who, despite circumstance, cared deeply about those in need. That spirit, that drive, that heart will motivate others now.
It’s like a candlelight service with people lighting each other’s candles until an entire community is illuminated. You and the others who serve are that light, no matter the chaos.
It was a terrible time, but there was great spirit abounding in those of us who stood in the front lines of the fight. The work broke my heart every day, but strengthened it too.
This brings up two things for me.
Because my mom worked in academia, I probably knew more openly gay men growing up than most folks of my generation. One of her coleagues used to stay at our house to keep my brother and I out of trouble when my parents were out of town. I did not know that he was gay until later, when we all went to the drive-in together and he was holding hands with another man. My mom preferred that we figure out for ourselves that he was gay so that we would understand how perfectly normal, even unremarkable in some ways, that it was,
He eventually left town. I did not know why until we got a letter from him. He had been diagnosed with AIDS. His family here in Tucson barely tolerated but never really accepted his gay-ness, so he went Back East to spend the last days of his life among some dear friends there. I never heard that he passed until a year or two later when his name came up in an article about the AIDS quilt in The New Republic.
***
I know some folks who work in AIDS non-profits here in town. One of them provides for hair-and-makeup services for HIV+ folks to feel presentable for job interviews or to otherwise be out in public. One thing I have come away with from talking to them is how the day-to-day work of these charities seems so mundane. In the public discussion, there is a tendency to look at the big picture in terms of fund-raising and public policy and to overlook the everyday problems that folks need help with. That is why we need to hear stories like this, to remind us that it is ultimately about human beings trying to figure out how to make it through the day.
Yes it is sometimes the little things. Giving people sustenance and a sense of community can make a huge difference.
I remember those days. You were, and continue to be, a force for good. Keep it up, Beth!
I think what humanity could use right now, especially now, is your life story in book form. Within such pages would be found definitive examples of caring and giving back. And much more - dedication, professionalism, humor, how to choose your own path, putting others first and of course love. Everything in your wonderful articles but in chronological order. A gift!
It’s easy for me to say. I’m not nearly as busy as you are.
But you wouldn’t have to teach Fairness to read. He’s experiencing it first-hand.
I feel like I may be ready for a book. It seems like time. Some of these stories are demanding to be told and I think that is a direct response to the chaos all around us now. Thank you for your support!
All the people. The ones you helped thrive. The ones who crossed your path but somehow couldn’t be reached. The ones, like Walta, now with the angels. Their stories have your voice.
Then, there’s your life’s journey. Before that actress who became so willing to mentor newcomers. Before the ladies and children of the Good Shepherd Shelter were uplifted by your group’s boundless efforts. Before the heartbreaking HIV/AIDS devastation. Before all that there was a young person who, despite circumstance, cared deeply about those in need. That spirit, that drive, that heart will motivate others now.
It’s like a candlelight service with people lighting each other’s candles until an entire community is illuminated. You and the others who serve are that light, no matter the chaos.
But no pressure to do a book. Right?
agree with chrisparker. you are a warm heart in a cold world and such a beautiful story about helping where it was so important
It was a terrible time, but there was great spirit abounding in those of us who stood in the front lines of the fight. The work broke my heart every day, but strengthened it too.
xoxox