Beth Broderick: Wit and Wisdom for the Ages from the Aged
Beth Broderick: Wit and Wisdom for the Ages from the Aged Podcast
"Rescue Me" The series. Chapter One: "Fairness"
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"Rescue Me" The series. Chapter One: "Fairness"

(With Audio)
17
Wit and Wisdom
by Beth Broderick

“Fairness Fairness, the wonder dog.

He is not a silly old frog

He is such a good, good boy.

He is Mommy’s pride and joy.”

This is the song I have been singing to Fairness, the rescue dog who has found his way into my life. Neither one of us consider it a particularly good song, but his name is in it along with the words “good boy”, so we are rolling with it for now.

The rescue woman Rhonda (an independent operator) calls him Rufus, but he prefers Fairness, and it is in keeping with his predecessors “Democracy” the Wolf-dog, “Social Justice” the Terrier, and “Roxy Votes” the Shepherd-lab mix.

I was walking along San Vicente Blvd when I met him. I was preparing to head up the hill to Sunset and then East to La Cienega or thereabouts, with a further plan to derive my way towards the Sunday Farmer’s Market on Melrose Place. 

Waiting for a walk signal at the traffic light, I stood next to Rufus/Fairness and his foster Mom, Heidi Jo, when he leaned toward me and nudged my hand, seeming to kiss it. 

“Oh my,” I said. “He is a love.”

“He is such a sweet boy,” she confirmed. “He needs a home.”

“Really? Oh my God! Can we talk for a minute?”

We sat on the wall that abuts the post office and talked for a good while. 

“I am supposed to be rescuing a small dog this time. My friends want me to make sure it is an animal that I can pick up and carry,” I stated but gave her a look that said, ‘I have not yet cottoned to that idea.’

“Me too, I really need a small one. I travel so much for work. It’s just not fair to leave them behind as often as I have to,” said Heidi.

“Kills me when I have to do it,” I nodded. “But I always make sure my dog is in the best possible care when I travel. Still, it kills me.” 

We talked for a little while longer and exchanged numbers. We have very similar lives. She is a producer, and I am an actress, but the demands on our time and the travel requirements are same-same. We broached the possibility of co-parenting. An idea that has merit, but also offers a host of complications.

I practically skipped up that steep incline. I felt certain, knew in my bones, that I had just met my next dog.

“Just one more big one,” I said to the heavens. “Just one more.”

I know my friends are right in urging me to find a smaller, more portable pet, but the specter of so many larger pups in need haunts me. In LA as in most cities, the shelters are mostly full of dogs that are over 60 pounds. This is due to weight restrictions in many apartment buildings and estimated cost of feeding and caring for a large animal. I am good with big dogs and difficult rescues; it just feels right to lend myself to that cause, to meet that need.

THE HERO’S FLIGHT.

Fairness is a Doberman Pinscher/Hound/Great Dane? He is long of leg and, thankfully, has his tail and ears intact. I don’t believe in the cutting off of tails and training up of ears and such. Let a dog be a dog. He is also a troubled guy. His startle response is off the charts. I reached over to put a piece of paper in the trash can at the park, and he leapt up, did a full 360 turn, and crouched down in terror. A man who swings his arms as he walks is an imminent threat. A car backfiring, an automatic door opening as we walk past. Anything can set him off.

When Heidi Jo was fostering, she had a few people over for brunch, and the dog was so terrified of one very tall fellow that he hid under her house for almost a full 24 hours. She thought he had run away.

No one knew where he was, so rescue was called. I had been in touch with Rhonda (the rescue lady), and was awaiting the paperwork to become a part of his foster team when she texted me that Rufus/Fairness was missing. I went over as soon as I could. It’s just a twenty-minute walk from my house. I roamed the nearby streets, looking under bushes and into thickets, but no sign of him. 

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Rhonda was out as well, going up and down Heidi Jo’s street, astride her pink bicycle, calling out for him. We both gave it over an hour, but it was getting late, and I needed to get home. Heidi Jo found him the next morning when he crawled out of his hiding place. That would not be the last time that he disappeared, his fight-or-flight mechanisms redounding to flight in every instance of adversity. Each time he returned ever more distraught.

I was hoping to keep him in foster care until I finished the movie I am shooting. I would have loved to have a lot of alone time with him in the very beginning, just the two of us figuring each other out, but that was not to be. Heidi Jo had to go overseas, and the other foster gal, Elaine, had to go help her dying mother, so there was an urgent need for someone to take over. I just put my head down and said yes. 

They brought him to me the day before I started the film. My old friend and former neighbor Rob, was called in to duty. I have hired him for the duration of the shoot. 

“I don’t want him to be alone for the first week. If you have to spend the night here, I need you to do that, okay?”

Rob agreed to this in spite of the true imposition it would have on the rhythm of his day-to-day life.

Rob is retired in his seventies, a gentle soul with a great feel for animals. Democracy, the Romanian rescue, trusted very few folks, but blessedly Rob was one of them. They got along famously, adored each other. Rob was a Godsend when my marriage blew apart and I was desperate for help with the dog. He was there for us, when we really needed him, and I will ever be grateful.

Rob also has a great, good, gorgeous case of OCD. Things have to be just so with Rob. He has rearranged every cupboard and moved all manner of objects from one place to another in a logic all his own. 

Of course, I arrange things with nary a nod to logic and almost exclusively toward what feels convenient in the moment. There is an order to my life that is discernible only to me, which has been a tetch disrupted. So, I now have no idea where somethings are and find myself digging into stacks of others because I am that person who has to eat pasta out of a specific bowl, which has been reassigned in the cabinet.

An excellent problem in the grand scheme of things.

He has also been here almost every minute that I could not be, and the time and attention are paying off. Fairness is gaining confidence and has put on a bit of weight. He is learning quickly to feel safe in this home.

Thank you, bless you, Rob. 

THE CONDO CANINE CRUSADER.

There was some concern from Rhonda rescue about him being in an apartment, but I think this environment is actually calming for him. It is contained. He is fully house broken, so he must have had a home before his life went to hell on the streets. We will never know.

The apartment is working out for him. There is nowhere to run or hide, and boy howdy, does he LOVE my bed and the faux fur blanket which adorns it. Once he got in it, he rarely ventured out except for walks and meals. Thank goodness he is a snuggler, because we have definitely made our bed together.

There is real work to do to turn him around. He is underweight, was starving when they found him. His muscles are not fully developed and his nervous system needs soothing. I am cooking chicken and sweet potatoes, and fortifying his chow with high-end canned food as well.

I have asked Rhonda for his vet records, but she says I cannot have them because I have not officially adopted Fairness. When I asked her to send the paperwork so that we could begin that process, this is how she responded:

“Yes, thank you… I’m just letting you know I’m way behind because I had Covid and long Covid and now I have a concussion and it’s been setting out for six months and I’m not even handling things in my own life at this time that are highly necessary for me ... yet, I still try to save a few lives off the streets.

He is safe and fully vetted, that’s what’s most important, and if there is anything he can go back to Vet in the meantime. I never do fast adoptions, by the way. I always do a foster to adopt period. Lately those have been too long due to my own personal health situation. 😞

-Ronnie 

????????????????????? Not sure what to make of this.

My old friend Jonathan Salkind, who is a holistic home health care vet and wildly in demand, will pay a visit this afternoon. He is not accepting new patients but has made this one exception, because he knows I cannot take the dog elsewhere without those records. He has advised me which foods to buy and we will start a vitamin regimen. He also gave me some organic calming drops which I will use sparingly, but am glad to have on hand. I will feel confident going forth using Dr. Salkind’s keen instincts toward how to heal my boy.

I don’t know the real reason behind Rhonda rescue’s reluctance to help me help him. She has been rescuing dogs for a long time, and it takes a special kind of person to engage in the work she does day in and day out, so I am giving her the benefit of the doubt. Her need for control in understandable, if perhaps in this case mis-guided. I am hoping she will come to see that Fairness is in good hands and receiving the best possible care.

In the meantime, I have been telling Fairness stories of other dogs and people I have known, who were rescued from difficult situations and went on to thrive. This has inspired the content of my next few installments of this column. 

This is chapter one of the “Rescue Me” series. There will be more to follow. Fairness’ rescue story is to be continued as we navigate the next steps, but one thing for certain: I will help him heal his past and I will give my all to build him a beautiful future.

And hopefully, for both of our sakes, I will write him a new song.

On we go …


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Beth Broderick: Wit and Wisdom for the Ages from the Aged
Beth Broderick: Wit and Wisdom for the Ages from the Aged Podcast
Beth Broderick dives deeply into her personal experience to deliver a weekly essay full of wit, wisdom, and stories from the heart.